You can be obsessed with the bad things people say and the good things, either way you’re obsessed with yourself and I’m not – you can become unhinged so easily. Vanity can apply to both insecurity and egotism. So I distance myself, because I feel everything.
Every one of these memories looks the same to me. I see all of these moments in bright, burning, red.
[on her acting method] To you it looks emotionally straining, but I don’t get emotionally drained, because I don’t invest any of my real emotions. I don’t take any of my characters’ pain home with me, I don’t even take it to craft services. I’ve never been through anything that my characters have been through. And I can’t go around looking for roles that are exactly like my life. So I just use my imagination. If it ever came down to the point where, to make a part better, I had to lose a little bit of my sanity, I wouldn’t do it. I would just do comedies.
There’s an old poem by Neruda that I’ve always been captivated by, and one of the lines in it has stuck with me ever since the first time i read it. It says “love is so short, forgetting is so long.” It’s a line I’ve always related to in my saddest moments, when I needed to know someone else had felt that exact, same way.
There is a tendency to want to get thick-skinned. There is a tendency to block out negative things, because they really hurt. But if I stop feeling pain, then I’m afraid I’ll stop feeling immense excitement and epic celebration and happiness. I can’t stop feeling those things, so I feel everything. And that keeps me who I am.
I love lyrics more than notes. A song is a favorite song not because the singer can hit and hold a high note but because of the words, their meaning. Sure, you have to incorporate a great melody. But I’m proud of those lyrics. And I’m lucky that I have a label that lets me sing and write all the songs on my records. Don’t get me wrong; I’m thankful I get to be a singer.